1. It’s the best day of your life. You have scored a whopping 98.2% marks in your Board Examinations, but all your friends have gone their ways and forgotten to congratulate you on your success. You have mixed feelings about the day and decide to pen down your feelings. Write your diary entry.
Wednesday,
9:00 pm
Today was the best day of my life but like every merit has a demerit this day has a drawback. Let’s start with the good news; today, as I wrote the day before, we went to receive our report card. As we came closer to the school my heart pounded with more force until the moment arrived when we got the report card. I opened it and looked at the percentage. I was shocked it was 98.2%. We all were very happy. While on the way back home, I updated my status on facebook that I got 98.2%. I waited for half a day for someone to congratulate me but no one called me the whole day. It was so embarrassing that I can’t tell.
Ananye
Pls check this and tell hoe much marks i can get in it out of 5 and explain the mistake
expert answer only pls
Dear Student,
I will score you 3/5 for this article.
Your diary entry is pretty good. Your format is correct and your ideas are clear. However, there are some errors in punctuation and grammar. Also, you need to improve on the reading quality of the entry. A phrase like ‘every merit has a demerit’ is not suitable in this context. Instead of saying ‘As we came....heart pounded with force’, you could say ‘my heart beat faster with each step closer to the school’. “It was so embarrassing that I can’t tell” is a colloquial way of phrasing; a better sentence would be “it was so embarrassing to be completely ignored that I feel like I can’t face anybody tomorrow. “
Please read the paragraph given below and compare it carefully with yours. Also, note the punctuations I have added/changed. That will help you see where you might have gone wrong. My writing style is, of course, very different from yours. You needn’t change your style; I have only rewritten to show you how your paragraph can read better.
Today was the best day of my life but like every merit has a demerit this day has a drawback.
Today was the best day of my life, and in some ways, the worst.
Let’s start with the good news; today, as I wrote the day before, we went to receive our report card.
Let’s start with the good news. Today, my parents and I went to collect my report card.
As we came closer to the school my heart pounded with more force until the moment arrived when we got the report card.
My heart beat faster with each step closer to the school, until I finally had the report card in my hands.
I opened it and looked at the percentage. I was shocked it was 98.2%. We all were very happy.
No errors.
While on the way back home, I updated my status on facebook that I got 98.2%.
On the way back home, I quickly updated my Facebook status, proudly announcing my marks.
I waited for half a day for someone to congratulate me, but no one called me the whole day.
I waited for someone to congratulate me, but to my dismay, no one called me the whole day.
It was so embarrassing that I can’t tell.
It was embarrassing to be completely ignored; all my happiness slowly drained away.
Today, thus, turned out to be confusing. I have very mixed feelings about it. I am indeed ecstatic about my marks, but, on the other hand, I am totally bogged down that nobody cared about it.
Hope this answers your question. For further doubts, please ask on the forum and our experts will be happy to help you as soon as possible.
Regards.
I will score you 3/5 for this article.
Your diary entry is pretty good. Your format is correct and your ideas are clear. However, there are some errors in punctuation and grammar. Also, you need to improve on the reading quality of the entry. A phrase like ‘every merit has a demerit’ is not suitable in this context. Instead of saying ‘As we came....heart pounded with force’, you could say ‘my heart beat faster with each step closer to the school’. “It was so embarrassing that I can’t tell” is a colloquial way of phrasing; a better sentence would be “it was so embarrassing to be completely ignored that I feel like I can’t face anybody tomorrow. “
Please read the paragraph given below and compare it carefully with yours. Also, note the punctuations I have added/changed. That will help you see where you might have gone wrong. My writing style is, of course, very different from yours. You needn’t change your style; I have only rewritten to show you how your paragraph can read better.
Today was the best day of my life but like every merit has a demerit this day has a drawback.
Today was the best day of my life, and in some ways, the worst.
Let’s start with the good news; today, as I wrote the day before, we went to receive our report card.
Let’s start with the good news. Today, my parents and I went to collect my report card.
As we came closer to the school my heart pounded with more force until the moment arrived when we got the report card.
My heart beat faster with each step closer to the school, until I finally had the report card in my hands.
I opened it and looked at the percentage. I was shocked it was 98.2%. We all were very happy.
No errors.
While on the way back home, I updated my status on facebook that I got 98.2%.
On the way back home, I quickly updated my Facebook status, proudly announcing my marks.
I waited for half a day for someone to congratulate me, but no one called me the whole day.
I waited for someone to congratulate me, but to my dismay, no one called me the whole day.
It was so embarrassing that I can’t tell.
It was embarrassing to be completely ignored; all my happiness slowly drained away.
Today, thus, turned out to be confusing. I have very mixed feelings about it. I am indeed ecstatic about my marks, but, on the other hand, I am totally bogged down that nobody cared about it.
Hope this answers your question. For further doubts, please ask on the forum and our experts will be happy to help you as soon as possible.
Regards.