Is anything wrong in this article

Dear Student,
Please make the following changes in the answer. You have done an excellent job by writing a creative article.

• technology of science -  scientific technology has taken us
• We are a developing country and we are, in a large scale, exposed to the use of...
• ... our country, it is necessary to develop...
• Sleep deficiency leads to health problems such as depression.
• ...must shift to...

Regards.