Please give a Line-by-Line explanation of the poem "Father to Son".

Dear Student,

I do not understand this child
​​​​He was when small.


In this first stanza of the poem, Father to Son, the poet shows father saying that he has not succeeded in understanding his son because, he himself could not grow up with his son. This may be because when the son was growing differently,  the father might
have kept himself aloof from the changes taking place in the outer world.
The narrow-mindedness of the father might have stopped him to understand the changes his son would have been experiencing. He is making attempt to understand him as a child instead of trying to know the changed world wherein his son is growing up.

However, the type of relationship the father now wants to develop with his son will do more harms than any good for the father will always think that his son is still a little child and is so far not in such a condition when he is able to understand his actual person.

Yet have I killed
Of understanding in the air.


In this stanza; the father thinks that when he grew the seed of his son, he expected him to grow and take branches under his shade but now when he has fully grown up it seems that all his expectations from his son are in vain.

The poet says that the father and son now behave like strangers in their own house, and it is hardly possible that they would ever be able to understand each other. The land that once used to belong to the father is now all for the son, who wants to walk, talk and live in his own way. There is almost nil sign of understanding between both of them.

This child is built to my design
Yet what he loves I cannot share.
Silence surrounds us.



In this stanza, Here, “what he loves” may mean to the things, trends and people that his son loves, and when he says: “I cannot share” it may mean a lot. Yes, it could either be the bad things or good things of his child or the self-centredness of the father who has now developed a kind of anger or hatred towards what his son likes.

This stanza also surprises me when “Silence surrounds us”.
How could you avoid talking about the seed that you planted with much care and cautiousness? Reading through this stanza, it can be realised that all concerns and worries that the father was showing was nothing but affectation of love towards his son.

I would have
Shaping from sorrow a new love.


This stanza presents the very different character of the father. Here, the father is shown in very callous form, which is not expected from any father on this earth. I am really surprised to see what the father was in the first and second stanza, and how he has become in this stanza. Let’s face it; no father in his senses would ever wish his son to go away from him and destroy his life.

Why would a father want his so to get lost and struggle for life? But this is the father who wishes so. He wishes that his son should go away from him and return like the prodigal son in the Bible. This sort of callousness of the father towards his son shows that he never loved his son. However, if we take this stanza in other way round, it will come to our knowledge that the father wishes his son to live and struggle so that his child can learn about the bitterness of his life, and become matured after having encountered the ups and downs of life.

He wants his son to return like a matured man full of experiences. This wish of the father may also be because of the tenderness and innocence that his child is going through. Anyway, whatever be the reason, the father wishes so he must stand by his child through thick and thin and help him know about the life though most of the things are known by the human beings itself. But if you can share your experience with your child, it not only helps him go ahead in his/her life, but also let me take a wise decision when it comes to any hardship in life. However, we must know that to err is human.

Father and son, we both must live
Longing for something to forgive.


In this last stanza of the poem, the poet doesn’t present what is expected from it. It does talk about the reconciliation, but doesn’t give any permanent solution. The father is shown and left lamenting and complaining, but doesn’t want to provide any solution.

Similarly the son is shown to be ready to reconcile and live again as they used to live earlier. But this does not end the problem of generation gap that remains between the father and son. Therefore, as a sign of reconciliation, each of them welcomes one another to live friendly.

Some readers may deject and resent on this reconciliation solution, but according to me, there is hardly any solution to the generation gap. There has always been generation gap, and it will be so for future generation. The only thing we can do is to understand the feelings of each other and line of respect must not be crossed and forgotten.


Regards.
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