Why does the poet "put that thought away" and loks outside?

The poet looked outside the window because she wanted to divert her painful thoughts about her mother and she felt that this could be the last time she could be spending time with her mother. She thought she would lose her mother to death. Hence to calm and console herself, she looked outside.

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Because the poet sees her mother dozing pale and she has a fear abt her mother so to avoid all these tensions she looks outside

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